Rebuild

Rebuild:

Anyone who has read some of my previous posts will be well aware that this is a year of rebuilding. After last year’s ripping out and pruning back, this year has been accelerated growth as my life is being rebuilt.

The foundations haven’t changed. If anything, I’ve actually dug deeper into the bedrock of Christ to create a more solid platform from which to build and grow.

At the beginning of the year, I was living in a temporary home over the winter as a place of safety and refuge, driving a temporary car after mine had been written off, and working in a temporary job, as I was covering my line manager’s role for a year after she was diagnosed with a brain tumour. Nothing felt stable, or long-term.

Now as well as the new job and car I have previously written about, I am now in the process of investing in a new home, OH MY DAYS!! This is all like proper adulting! I’m not sure I’m ready to do this!

Can’t I just build a duvet fort and let someone else make decisions? Apparently not! Although…. I can build a fort in any room I choose when I move in! Oooo and a teepee in the garden…with fairy lights…and a fire pit…and…OK, I digress!

Buying a new home is the biggest investment most of us will ever make. It’s not something to take lightly. But how on earth do you go about choosing somewhere to live? It’s not like a new pair of heels, where you can just take them back if they don’t fit!

I checked out about four places around the area I knew I wanted to move to, and while I put an offer on one, which was rejected in favour of a higher offer from someone else, I kinda went on gut instinct and prayerful consideration.

“Could I see myself living there?” was at the forefront of my mind when I was looking around. Would my furniture fit? One of the places looked like there wasn’t enough space for everything I already had. So even though it was nice enough, it wasn’t right.

I also knew I didn’t want to go above paying the “stamp duty” so that was my ultimate limit, and my ultimate fleece when I made an offer on the one I settled on.

What I have learned, very quickly this year, is how much we have to negotiate through life. Whenever I went to Israel, I knew the principle of bartering, but being the good Brit that I am, mostly accepted the price written on the label. But so often we can miss an opportunity, when we write-off something as being above our budget, or our pay-grade. Or we undervalue ourselves.

Dont be afraid to negotiate, don’t be afraid to value yourself, and demand what you know you’re really worth. Life has many chances to be better – seize each of them, and even if it goes wrong – you can rebuild on the rubble of past chances to gain a better vantage point for yourself.

Challenging Male:Female Experience

When someone tries to tell me I can’t do something… This kinda makes me more determined to try. And being the kind of woman that when I try something I don’t stop until I’ve successfully mastered it, means that as I step up to the challenge, I’m constantly in a state of development. And very competitive about it!

So when I read the following result of a What Car? survey from a few years ago, this was like a “you can’t” red flag to the competitive bull in me!

I’m sorry…. Say what now!!! Why should I, as a woman, pay more for a car I like?!? Game on!

As it was my 40th in January, I’d already decided this was the year I would be upgrading my 14 year old reliable Yaris for something new and more reflective of who I am becoming. So the scene is set.

Problem is – I have never haggled in my life! Cue male colleague and friend to egg me on in the background, and I am ready to go.

I used the carwow website to start the process, by telling dealers out there what I wanted and let them do the hard work of getting me their offers and deals. I then chose two I liked the sound of and messaged the dealers directly, asking them to call me to talk through what they can actually offer me – not just the blurb on the page they’d copy and pasted.

Being the type of lady I am, I was open with both of these boys in letting them know I was in negotions with a second dealer and would go for the best offer.

Then came the calls and the negotions. Like I said, I did have someone egging me on encouraging me to not settle for the first offer I received. Oh my days that was hard!!! It sounded so good!!! What if they changed their minds and pulled out?!?

The upshot is: they didn’t. They wanted the deal more than I wanted the car, so I managed to negotiate between the two dealers and arrange a PCP offer which started at £273 a month drop to £199 a month. And I asked for a full tank of petrol. Ohhh and some mats too. And they reduced GAP year insurance from £650 down to £250 when I told them I’d found it cheaper online!

And that was without the need to sashay in my heels and flutter my eyelids!!

When I went to pick up the car, the “winning dealer” wasn’t overly happy to see me – I didn’t even get offered a cappuccino when I had to go through all the paperwork! Clearly my deal ate into some of his commission – but when you look at the hefty reductions I received… Just goes to show how large the profit margins are!

So, me and my Audi-Belle are looking forward to a happy life together with so much adventure in front of us. Life truly does begin at 40! And being incredibly competitive has its bonuses. More often than not!

A Natural Order For Finances

Most of the time, while I understand there is a natural order to how much of life works, it’s often something beyond my comprehension because… Well… it just happens! Whether I actively engage or not – life continues and the natural order of how it all fits together, continues to fit together without my having a degree in it. Which is such a relief, I’ll be honest!

Take the Kingdom principle of tithing, for example. While it seems misguided by the world’s understanding of how money works, to “give away ten whole percent” of what you receive, by Kingdom standards it is a given principle to best manage your money.

I’ve heard soooooo many sermons on this, it became confusing: tithe on the gross, tithe on the net, tithe on gifts you receive, don’t tithe on gifts you receive, tithe even when you’re in debt, don’t tithe when you’re in debt…. Yada yada yada! Honestly, what should be so simple has become legalistically complicated.

The way I have managed to tithe (and if I’m being straight up honest, over the years I’ve not always been a good Christian girl with my money) is this: What is the Holy Spirit prompting you to do in your heart? Don’t ponder it too long, or try to say you don’t know because you can’t hear Him. God speaks when we listen, and the convictions of our heart are a clear indication when He is leading you. If you’re in debt, this might well look different to someone who is rolling in it. Don’t feel bad – be obedient.

There were times when I was earning next to nothing, and somehow, even when I tithed back to God, I made it to the end of the month. But then, this last year the Holy Spirit asked me to give a certain amount over the course of the year rather than a “set” tithe amount, and as a result of my obedience He has made provision when I hadn’t even known provision would be needed. AND He has cleared some of the debt which had been there in the background waiting to rear its ugly head when I hadn’t known it was there. Not to mention the chance to live completely out of the overdraft zone.

Would He have done this even if I’d held back on the scary amount I knew He was prompting from me? I don’t know. But I’d rather know for definite my obedience led to action on His part. This is the natural order of God’s principle – it seems uncomfortable and scary, and not achievable, but God has a plan IN our obedience.

It comes down to understanding the heart of God and His principle. It’s not about “making a payment” as much as it’s about “giving back to God”. But I think it’s also about our heart – are we hanging onto every penny because we don’t fully trust God, and so elevate the “love of money” above our love of God? Are we stingily refusing to let go of what we think we have earned – mine, mine, my precious?

There is a natural order for the money we earn which the author of, “Love is not Enough” writes as being:

1. Get out of Debt.
2. Save: short term and long term strategies.
3. Invest to make your money work for you.

I’d like to propose an amendment:

1. Tithe – however that looks between you and God.
2. Get out of debt.
3. Save.
4. Invest.

Although – knowing God, He might just switch the order for Himself according to the future plan He has for you. It’s about using our finances to honour God, and allowing Him to be glorified in how we spend. Be wise and let the Holy Spirit led you to better management of your finances this year.

We’re only at the start of our journey through 2017, and don’t want to run out before we reach the end. Let’s walk strong together and live like the sons and daughters of the King who declares,

“For all the animals of the forest are mine, and I own the cattle on a thousand hills.” Psalms‬ ‭50:10‬

When you know to Whom you belong, it’s hard to slouch through debt and money problems without His assistance. He can help you – but you have to be ready to help yourself. If you’re burying your head in the sand from the money problems you have, how can you be fixing your eyes on the one who can help and save you? Lift up your eyes to the hills – your help comes from God, the maker of heaven and earth who will give you the tools and guidance you need to follow Him out of financial problems. Sometimes this might well include letting go of our pride and seeking help from someone else.

The world says the answer is to get more debt to pay off the debt – God says, “There is another way, but you need to look up and fix your eyes on Me”. The world says, “Buy now, pay later.” But God says, “This is not a Kingdom principle. This is adding worry to your life. Do not worry about what you shall eat or what you shall wear…”

I pray that 2017 will see you not only walking out of your financial problems, but shaking the dust off that particular town as you move into the “free indeed” aspect of what God has for you. It’s going to be a hard walk – but don’t slouch, walk tall and you will reach your destination. Wherever that may be for you, however long it may take you. And don’t worry if this is more than a one year goal.

Taking Control – The Chocolate Fight!

So when I started reading, “Love is Not Enough” by Merryn Somerset Webb, I didn’t expect her to challenge my love of chocolate as much as she did!

While she writes, “When I see something I want…I look at the price and see how many working hours it will take to pay for it…Spending – even if unnecessary – is not all bad… Think of spending in terms of how much happiness you are buying yourself for the money you are spending, offset against the money you are earning. Is it enough? Very often it is not.”

I would say the “happiness” level can be measured both at the time of purchase and after. How many times I have bought an item of clothing, for example, and the happiness is very short lived! It looks worse on me than it did on the hanger!!! Argh!

So what does this have to do with chocolate? Well… Too much of my hard earned cash is not exactly offset by a correlating amount of happiness with the amount of chocolate consumed.

For example, most of the time I’ll probably pay around 70p for a bar of chocolate. One of the little ones – let’s not even get into the bigger bars!!! Let’s say, for argument sake, I buy an average of 4 bars a week. That’s £2.80 a week on chocolate. Which works out at £11.20 a month. Let’s add in 2 of the £1 bigger bars for those bad days, or those share with friends moments, and that’s approximately £13.20 a month on chocolate.

Over a year? £158.40 – which we might as well round up to £160 because… Some weeks are worse than others and that is a lot of chocolate money!!! Ouch!!! That’s like a spa treatment, a weekend away or tickets to see artists and singers I’ve not actually seen yet.

And while chocolate masquerades as my friend, leading up to the moment of consumption- after it just mocks me!!! So the happiness factor is devalued as a result.

Being money smart is about making small changes where you can see it – and being real about the small things we spend it on. Sometimes it’s about stopping and thinking, do I really need to scoff that much chocolate this year??

Not to mention the correlating benefit to the waistline, to the skin, to your health… You know it’s more than just about finances, right?!

On this occasion, maybe I’ll slouch my way past the chocolate aisle…!

Feeling Virtuous!

In my bid to reduce the amount of money I’ve been spending on food, I have stumbled across this whole new world known as #MealPrep. It looks quite tedious in the short-run, but very organised and domestic goddessy in the long run. So I thought I’d give it a try and compare the amount I would typically spend in a week eating at work with what I spend on meal prepping.

So on the first day, I spent £27 just buying a set of containers! Hahaha! Money saving expert I clearly am not! My problem is the items had to match, and when I realised I could get a pink set…..I couldn’t resist! I tried to ignore it, but the containers had me in their sights and refused to let go!

Actually, this also included a Brita Fill & Go filter water bottle, to reduce the amount I spend on buying bottled water. So far I may have spent £11.99 on it, and yes it is pink too, but in the first morning I have saved myself £2 on the drinks I would have bought – so within a week, this would have paid for itself….as long as I remember to bring it with me to work each day! I’m nearly 40 you know…apparently is all downhill for the old grey cells!

I’ve chosen to continue to visit the café on the estate where I work, purely because it gets me away from the desk and I can have a chat with the girls who work here while in a comfortable armchair. Latte and Smoothies it is then! I think I can smash my challenge to reduce the amount I spend here in a month…….she says on day one!

Taking Control – Lunch Money

As everyone knows, eating at the desk is like seriously damaging for your mental health. Having said that, eating out every day is seriously damaging to your financial health!

So, what’s a lady to do!?

Merryn Somerset Webb notes in her book, “Love is Not Enough” that on average people spend around £4 a day on lunch which works out at around £1044 a year.

A £4 lunch??? Not where I work! I can spend anything between £8-£15 on eating at the delicious cafe set in the grounds where I work. The food is literally divine, the chairs are comfy and it’s a short walk from my office to get away from the desk and worky stuff. The coffee is great. The staff are like old friends and I tend to “treat myself” to breakfast and lunch….just because!

So basing an average of, let’s say £12 per day, I’m currently working 5 days a week, so this works out at £60 per week. Over a month? £240. Hmmm…. How many pairs of shoes can I buy with that?!

I’m probably not going to stop nipping across to the Pantry, because it is more about getting some “me-space” as much as it’s about eating. But I can be a bit more savvy about how much I’m spending on a weekly or a monthly basis. Do I really need to spend that much a day? Can I not budget better and reduce this monthly outgoing?

Maybe I should switch the heels for walking boots a couple of times and have a walk around the deer park instead of sitting in the big, soft, comfy, cozy armchair…?

Maybe I don’t need a bacon butty every morning!

Maybe when I’m having a particularly difficult and stressful day, I don’t really need one of the very special, very naughty emotional hugs which I don’t even have to ask for anymore…

Maybe I should take some of my own food into the office, and just have a coffee or smoothie in the Pantry, and enjoy the chat with the girls who work there!

Challenge set!

Challenge accepted!

It’s not about totally denying myself little treats and enjoying the fruit of my labour. It’s about finding the right balance between financial hearth, wisdom and foolishness! Maybe that hot chocolate will still be needed on occasion after all, just not on a daily occasion.

Financial Aspirations!

Everyone makes “New Year’s Resolutions” at the beginning of the New Year – with most of them being broken or forgotten about within a matter of weeks. I prefer to set goals I hope to achieve, and over the last few years, have mostly achieved what I set out to do. Although, hands up, sometimes the goals end up having to continue for more than one year!!

This year is a bigger determiner of the goals I have set, as there is much which will need to change as a result of the journey I’ve taken over the course of the last 18 months or so.

Oh… and as I enter a new decade of life! That kinda causes you to take stock of where you’re at and what you hope to achieve.

I started reading a book called, “Love is not enough” by Merryn Somerset Webb during the Christmas break. It’s a few years old, but very good – and the advice is still relevant. It’s not about love and romance, so don’t get too excited, if that’s what you’re hoping for! It’s subtitled, “The Smart Woman’s Guide to Money”. I can’t vouch for you, but I think I’m smart enough to read it!!

Of course, none of the advice is particularly new… In terms of paying off debt, not spending more than you earn, saving more, yada yada, but it’s presented in a way I can identify with (Direct Quote: “I happen to think that having a coffee in Starbucks every morning is worth it…” Oh how I love this lady!!!) and I guess I am at a stage to move to the next level of taking control of some areas of my life – so it’s about being ready to receive and act on the relevant sections of this advice, as I walk toward achieving my new goals.

I praise God He has allowed me to be debt-free after a difficult year – which includes the paying-off of a debt which had been accumulated without my knowledge. So I know He will help me to curb some of my unnecessary spending (do I really need ANOTHER pair of heels to go with that new outfit I just ordered….yes 😍 no 😳 Maybe 🤔).

Of course, the other aspect of this means I know exactly what I’m worth and what I’m bringing to the table, so “Love is not enough” if any potential suitor can’t take control of his finances either. Twice stung leads to sassy, smart understanding of what I need to see being laid on the table in the future. Sweet smile. Steely gaze.

Happy New Year – And as I learn how to make my finances work for me, may you also learn how to make your finances work for you. After all – why should the statistic on the right apply to you or I, if God is on our side.